Dating other people relationship

26-Apr-2015 09:23

dating other people relationship-1

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No matter what, say experts, whether a couple decides to be open or monogamous should be a matter of choice.

“When there is no stigma to having an open sexual relationship,” writes Anderson, “men and women will begin to be more honest about what they want…and how they desire to achieve it.”As for me, these days I’m a one-man kinda gal—which I learned by being open.

But these categories are pretty fluid, and they shift depending on a given couple’s needs and boundaries. —Why Couples Go Rogue The tricky thing about relationships is they’re all different, so there’s no “one reason” why people decide to explore alternative relationship models.

Still, there are a wide range of theories about why monogamy hasn’t proved universally satisfying.

Some experts say it has roots in genetics: About 80 percent of primates are polygamous, and similar estimates apply to human hunter-gatherer societies.

(Still, it’s not useful to get caught up in the “is it natural” argument, says Kerner: Variation is what’s natural, more so than monogamy or nonmonogamy.)Other research suggests different people have different needs for a satisfying relationship.

Add to that the fact that I’d been single for a while (after having been in a monogamous relationship for even longer) and—I’m woman enough to admit it—wasn’t ready to give up the freedom to flirt with strangers.In short, there are as many reasons to be nonmonogamous as there are nonmonogamous people—and therein lies a bit of a problem.Even if a couple agrees to be nonmonogamous, their reasons for doing so might be in conflict.Beyond that, I wasn’t sure what I wanted, exactly, but I knew I didn’t want to feel suffocated by a partner.

So when I started dating...let's call him 'Bryce,' I geared myself up for hurt feelings, got over my own awkwardness, and broached it: Have you ever thought about having an open relationship?Open relationships tend to fall into two general categories, says Greatist Expert and sex counselor Ian Kerner: Couples might negotiate a nonmonogamous arrangement like the one I had with Bryce, in which each individual has the freedom to date and/or have sex with people outside the relationship.

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