Dating a girl who is not exclusive
I’ve been emphasising something over the past few months that I feel it’s time to revisit: Dating is a discovery phase.Use the period from when you meet whether it starts out online or in the ‘real world’ as an opportunity for you both to discover the ‘facts’ about one another and assimilate whether you want to progress…or opt out. I would do almost anything to bring her back to the subject at hand, to get her refocused on the kissing and the “mmms.” Almost anything, but not anything. This last part scares the living daylights out of most men (and some women). Here are some guidelines: I know women who make clear on the very first date that they aren’t interested in playing games, that unless the guy is looking for monogamy and a real, adult relationship, the guy should look elsewhere. Oh, and one other small point: You may never, ever be able to sleep with anyone else ever again.Maybe this is what scares me about some of the stories I hear – I know that dating can be tough, especially if you’re doing it online.
I’m not saying that there might not be a hiccup here or there, but if you start dating someone and you’re already feeling like you have to ‘work’ at a relationship you don’t have, the rot will set in fast. Our job when we date, aside from hopefully enjoying ourselves, is to work out what and who we’re dealing with before we make a commitment to have an exclusive relationship and before we feel safe enough to put both feet in and invest ourselves. Manage your insecurities, address any limiting beliefs, and don’t make dating a vocation.
It involves timing and psychotherapy, as such stories often do.) Rosie understood. What’s important here is that the “exclusivity talk,” as some call it, is perhaps the most pivotal point in any budding relationship—one that transforms single people into committed couples who’ve made their first steps toward marriage, kids, and a lifetime of memories together.